She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
do nipples grow back?
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