found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
