I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
