we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
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