How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
