y did u give ur computer a hand job?
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
