Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
