went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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