Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
