grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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