How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
