Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I FOUND THE LEGS
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
