It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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