Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
