His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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