All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
