No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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