Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
