Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Randomize
