Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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