There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
