You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
