You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
