So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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