I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
