No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
