dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
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