Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
