Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
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