Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Terrible idea I love it
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
