just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
