I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
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