No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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