Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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