What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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