you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize