I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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