i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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