Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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