You work out of a Hotel?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
