Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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