420 ftw
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
