fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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