I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
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