Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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