Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
