he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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