so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
