Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Randomize
