idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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