i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Randomize
